Posted by
GunnyG© on Wednesday, October 21, 2009 7:14:22 AM
HISTORY: Veterans Day is an annual American holiday honoring military veterans. Both a federal holiday and a state holiday in all states, it is usually observed on November 11. It is also celebrated as Armistice Day or Remembrance Day in other parts of the world, falling on November 11, the anniversary of the signing of the Armistice that ended World War I. U.S. President Woodrow Wilson first proclaimed an Armistice Day for November 11, 1919. The United States Congress passed a concurrent resolution seven years later on June 4, 1926, requesting the President issue another proclamation to observe November 11 with appropriate ceremonies. An Act (52 Stat. 351; 5 U. S. Code, Sec. 87a) approved May 13, 1938, made the 11th of November in each year a legal holiday; "a day to be dedicated to the cause of world peace and to be thereafter celebrated and known as 'Armistice Day'." In 1953, an Emporia, Kansas shoe store owner named Al King had the idea to expand Armistice Day to celebrate all veterans, not just those who served in World War I. King had been actively involved with the American War Dads during World War II. He began a campaign to turn Armistice Day into "All" Veterans Day. The Emporia Chamber of Commerce took up the cause after determining that 90% of Emporia merchants as well as the Board of Education supported closing their doors on November 11, 1953, to honor veterans. With the help of then-U.S. Rep. Ed Rees, also from Emporia, a bill for the holiday was pushed through Congress. President Dwight Eisenhower signed it into law on May 26, 1954. Congress amended this act on November 8, 1954, replacing "Armistice" with Veterans, and it has been known as Veterans Day since.
Liberals have introduced a bill into the House named: All Person's Day, to replace Veterans Day. The Sponsor of the Bill, Red Nanny Pelosi stated: "There is no reason why just America's veterans should be celebrated on this day. Why, everyone should be celebrated. Didn't the war protestors.in the 60's follow their patriotic duty? And since gays cannot serve openly in the military, then why should we celebrate this day for the military? Wouldn't it be better if we all just got along?"
One veteran was heard to quip, "I'm sick and d*mn tired of the kooks out in San Fransicko. What the hell are they thinking, allowing this nutcase to stay in office? We should wall off the Bay Area and sell it to the Taliban in return for a promise to never attack us again. A few decades of living under Islamofascists should cure them of their liberalism!"
Other liberals were quick to jump on the bill after working all night behind closed doors to force a health care reform on the American people at the cost of 1 Trillion dollars. Hanoi John Fonda Kerry stated: "Hey, did you know I served in Vietnam? But I agree with my esteemed liberal comrade Red Nanny on this. In fact, I've cut every military program since I was elected Senator! If they have no money, they can't fight, right? I protested with my friend Hanoi Jane Fonda and I can tell you, we stayed up late some nights making signs and slogans to hurl at 'the man'. Remember the one "Hey, hey LBJ, how many kids did you kill today?" well, I didn't write that one, I wrote, "Hey, hey JFK (John Francois Kerry) how many purple hearts WILL you win today? Cool huh? Oops, gotta go, its windsurfing time. Remember, I once served in Vietnam and won 3, no 4, wait, yeah, 3 purple hearts."
John Murtha, the liberal from Pennsylvania who was exposed as having won fake medals in Vietnam for combat, even though he was a REMF intel pogue, stated: "I agree with Red Nanny on this. Of course, I agree with her on just about everything. The military is under such pressure to be celebrated that they kill innocent Iraqis in their sleep. They don't mean to do it, they just want their own holiday! I mean, Marines killed the enemy way too viscously but they're under pressure to preform in order to get a holiday. If we switch this to All Person's Day, then the pressure is off of the military and they won't have to torture innocent Iraqis, rape their women, force their kids to play soccer with donated balls until they pass out from the heat, you know. Remember Fallujah? That's what I mean. Hey, anyone see that rich Saudi prince I was talking to? He was going to invest in my new corporation, ABSCAM Industries."
Henry Waxman followed quickly on the heels of Murtha. "I know that I'm the ugliest man in the United States as well as being a short sawed-off runt and mad at the world for it. That's why All Person's Day is a good thing. I was too gutless to serve in the military so I don't think that THEY rate a holiday. Those babykillers need a lesson taught to them anyway. That's why I'm opening a special investigation on Veterans Day and anyone connected with it. Of course, I've managed to steer ANY investigation of my actions with Code Pink and Fallujah away with red herrings and threats so THAT's cool."
One liberal was not to happy about it. Senator Diane "MILCON" Feinstein has this to say: "I've been directing contracts from the military to my husband's companies for years now and it's made us rich beyond our wildest dreams and believe me, as liberal elites, we love rolling in our money while we spent other people's money! If we cut back on the military or pass this All Person's Day, my hubby, Ralph Blum, won't be able to make his fat salary or his wildly fat bonuses that Obama's Pay Czar ignores! I'll have to get with Dingy Reid on this one."
A veterans's group, that asked to remain anonymous, due to threats of retaliation from Deadfish Emanuel stated: "You know, it's bad enough that liberals screwed us in the Phillipines in 1942. That they left us stranded on Wake Island even though we kicked Japanese butt for two weeks! That they screwed the poor guys in Task Force Smith in Korea in 1950. That they cut and ran in Vietnam, cut off funding to our allies, the South Vietnamese, and then ignored the Boat People! That they abandon our allies, like the Shah of Iran, the Iraqis, and soon-to-be the Afghani people, but this is stupid. What's next, Smelly Liberal Hippie Day?"
President Obama issued a statement of concurrence to the bill. "I once thought about joining the military in a marijuana haze but I soon snapped out of it. We liberals should stay out of the military since they're too aggressive. That is, unless I can gayify it. Then the doors will be open for them to serve openly and they'll turn into something like the Swedish military. Yeah, it'll gut the military but then again, America deserves it for being aggressive imperialist running-dog lackeys and it is all Bush's fault. Maybe I'll hold five or six press meetings on All Person's Day with my Lapdog media. Did I mention that I inherited this mess from Bush. It's Bush's fault. Now where is my $100.00 per pound Kobe steak and arugula?"
Ted Kennedy, who had his father buy him a billet in Paris France, when he was in the Army after being expelled from Harvard for cheating, in 1951, while war waged in Korea could not be reached for comment, evidently he's still dead (until the next election that is) but veteran's groups agreed that he'd sell them out if he could. One vet noted: "He helped Hanoi John Fonda Kerry and Hanoi Jane Fonda sell us out while I was in Nam eating C-rations, living like a dog, but I was proud to serve my nation. These guys simply suck."
House Resolution 666 is set to come before the Congress and since there is a majority of gutless anti-American liberals infesting that building like roaches in a crack house, this resolution is sure to pass through with flying colors. Many liberals interviewed said that this is all about the Hope and Change that Obama promised them. "Hey man," one liberal noted, "just because we're too chickensh*t to serve, especially if there is a war on, doesn't mean we're not people too. Yeah, I spit on GI's in the 60's, hurled pig's blood at them, vandalized recruiting stations, and then moved to Berkeley, but hey, everyone else was doing it too. I HOPE that Obama CHANGES everything about the military. They win too much and that's not fair to the enemy. It should be, you know, more fair. We win one, they win one, like that. Yeah, and gays should serve openly with time off to attend the Folsom Street Fair!"